Conformity

Conformity is doing what others do without questioning it.

This picture of 'human lemmings' is from www.surrealart.com/


Conformity is about complying with social behaviour to avoid rejection or gain social approval(1).

Studies in psychology by Baron (1996)(2) showed that students who were uncertain about the right answer would conform to a colleagues answer, which was deliberately wrong,50% of the time, especially when it seemed important.
There is a famous study by Professor Stanley Milgram in which 63% of 'teachers' were willing to give shocks of up to 450 volts to 'learners' when they were asked to by an authority figure(3).
This study not only showed compliance with authority but also, as Myers in his book 'Psychology' points out, by starting at a small voltage and then escalating it step by step the 'teachers' were able to justify the small action in their minds and that made it easier to go to the next step and so progressing through to the end(4).

A quote from one of the students in Hamarus' and Kaikkonen's study on bullying reflects this gradual acceptance
"there were a few ...who always said to him/her like 'shut up' and then like, well okay, maybe that was a bit nasty and wrong, but not now"(5).
Myers states that these "experiments demonstrate that strong social influences can make people conform to falsehoods or capitulate to cruelty"(6).

The desire to be seen to be the same as others is a trait used by bullies in order to gain social standing and power(7). Bullies emphasize negative differences in another student through tale-telling(8) and create an 'us' group that other students will conform to due to a fear of social punishment(9).
The example they use in the article is that of fatness. If fatness is seen as culturally unacceptable within the pupil community then cases of anorexia nervosa will develop (10).

Sexual harassment also relies on others accepting and agreeing to harassing behaviour.
Sexual harassment usually begins in high school and occurs to both girls and boys. These young people will be grabbed and groped and sexually ridiculed by other, usually male, students.
In his book "Raising Boys" Steven Biddulph states that at his high school 2 boys in his class would catcall crudely whenever a young girl, whose breasts had developed earlier than those of others, walked into the classroom.
"I think we all wished they would stop...they made her life miserable. I wished we had had a strong enough boy-culture to tackle them,tell them to stop, to confront the stupidity and cruelty of it."(11)

Yet this behaviour is seen by perpetrators as "just part of school life...a lot of people do it...it's no big deal"(12).

The idea that the bodies of women are available to be abused and the behaviour that goes with it is carried through by some men into college where male peer support networks encourage other men, who may experience stress in dating, into sexually, physically or psychologically abusing women(13).
Of course once this behaviour is seen as acceptable amongst groups of men it is also carried through into the workplace.
Again from Biddulph "In a suburban... office, three... senior men crowd into a small office and close the door. The seventeen-year-old receptionist looks up nervously, because this has happened before. The men surround her and ...make comments on her clothes and inquire...about her sex life. When they finally leave, she collapses into tears."(14)

Also now as "imagery of urban pimp lifestyle has been taken up in rap and hip hop culture, and popularised by record companies in a way that perpetuates misuse of African American symbols"(15) the 'pimping' and sexual exploitation of women is being included into popular culture in a way that increases conformity with these behaviours of sexual harassment.

"'Creep' is a word given to people who act sexually with no feeling for others."
"where ever no women are present...the quite ugly way the (teenage) boys talk about women and girls is unsettling...The talk is just a macho pose. Others may not be joking...A big problem is that, since this is the boy-culture where attitudes are being shaped, younger boys in these settings will think this is how they are supposed to talk, feel and behave towards women"(16) unaware of the inappropriatness of their behaviour and of its impact on women.


(1)Myers D 2001 Psychology 6th edn. Worth publishers USA p.652
(2)ibid p.652
(3)ibid p.653
(4)ibid p.655
(5)Hamarus P & Kaikkonen P 2008 School bullying as a creator of pupil pressure Educational Research vol.50 no.4 p.342
(6)Myers 'as above' p.655
(7)Hamarus & Kaikkonen 'as above' p.338
(8)ibid p.342
(9)ibid p.342
(10)ibid p.342
(11)Biddulph S 2003 Raising Boys 2nd edn. Finch Publishing Sydney p.114
(12)Kopels S & Dupper D 1999 School based peer sexual harassment Child Welfare vol.LXXVIII no.4 p.457
(13)Schwartz & DeKeseredy 2000 Aggregation bias and woman abuse Journal of Interpersonal Violence 15 p.557
(14)Biddulph S 2003 raising Boys 2nd edn. Finch Publishing Sydney p.111
(15)Berndt L On meeting Dawn from Conversations about Gender, Culture, Violence and Narrative Practice edn Yuen A & White C 2007 Dulwich Centre Publications Adelaide p.92
(16)Biddulph S 'as above' p.111

The other why?

So why do some men react in ways that might injure those around them?

-anger is an expression of extreme or passionate displeasure

-aggression is the practice of attacking without provocation

-violence is behaviour involving physical force intended to hurt, damage or kill

-abuse is the physical, sexual or psychological maltreatment of another person(1)

This emotion and these behaviours do occur seperately but sometimes together.In Australia, they are seen as culturally acceptable ways for men, in particular to express themselves eg. sports players and movie heroes(2).

Anger and violence are often combined in domestic violence.

Social learning theory states that children model their behaviour on the behaviours they observe in their social environment. So that when children witness spousal violence in the home they then learn to act and relate to others in the same way, especially if the child identifies with the perpetrator(3).
Violence is seen as an effective means of changing behaviour, a way of achieving an end.

Bevan and Harris' research on a small sample (39) of men receiving counselling for domestic violence found that there was a link between witnessing family violence and physical abuse as a child to later perpetrating psychological spousal abuse(4).Neglect, sexual abuse and psychological abuse as a child were seen as predicting the possibility of later physical abuse of a spouse.
So through their research domestic violence was not just a learned behaviour but other complex processes such as child maltreatment were also involved (5).

Trudinger in an article on young men and anger refers to our culture as a 'culture of violence'(6) because he states that in certain contexts we see violence as acceptable. Though it may not be seen as the 'proper' thing to do violence is seen to be effective and is therefore often used by parents and teachers. But violence is a way of forcing things upon others and does not teach right from wrong nor other ways of engaging.
"I can think of no more powerful instrument to crush the spirit of children than being beaten by those adults who love them" (7).

Anger and violence are also dominant constructions of masculinity(8). It is culturally acceptable for men to display anger whereas it is not acceptable for women to do so.

In a culture were violence is an accepted norm for men therefore sexual violence would seem inevitiable.

In studies on college students in Canada, Schwartz and DeKeseredy found that men who engaged in sexually violent behaviours actually encouraged their male peers to engage in the sexual, physical or psychological abuse of women(9). Schwartz and DeKeseredy call it proabuse male peer support and found that it was a key determinant of the abuse of women in both dating and marriage(10).

The men who engaged in this abuse were more likely to believe that men have power and control over women in intimate relationships(11) and they provided guidance and advice to influence and encourage other men to also engage in similar abuse(12), which included using physical force to make a girlfriend accede to a demand(13) .

Violence is therefore not only learnt in the home and accepted within our culture but there are men who support and encourage others in the abuse of women. The complexities of this 'why?' would be historically and culturally far reaching.

Picture is by Gary Larson from Myers 'Psychology'

Studies in Social Psychology also show that individuals who watch pornographic material are more likely to interpret womens behaviour, which is just friendly as being sexual and they will also view sexual aggression as less serious(14).

In a study by Malamuth and Check (1981) men who watched films with some sexual violence stated that they would be more likely to commit rape if they thought they could get away with it than men who had watched non-sexual films(15).

By combining violence with sexual films mens acceptance of aggression against women increases.

Films and television do influence our behaviours. They provide us with social scripts- constructed ways of behaving within our culture- so that when we are in an unfamiliar situation
sometimes we will rely on these constructed scripts to interpret others behaviour and to influence our own(16).

(1)The Australian Oxford Dictionary 2004 edited by Bruce Moore 2nd edn Oxford University Press

(2)Trudinger M 2000 Young men, angry language and the language of anger Gecko no. 3 Dulwich Centre Publications p.35

(3)Bevan E & Higgins D 2002 Is domestic violence learned? the contribution of five forms of child maltreatment to men's violence and adjustment Journal of Family Violence vol.17 no.3 p.225

(4)ibid. p. 241

(5)ibid. p. 24

(6)Trudinger as above p.35

(7)Hardy K 2002 To be a healer not a jailer: implications for therapists in moving beyond punishment The International Journal of Narrative Therapy and Community Work
2002 Dulwich Centre Publications No.2 http://www.dulwichcentre.com.au/

(8)Trudinger as above p.36

(9) Schwartz M & DeKeseredy W 2000 Aggregation bias and woman abuse Journal of Interpersonal Violence vol.15 p.557

(10)ibid. p.557

(11)ibid. p.559

(12)ibid. p.560
(13)ibid. p.559

(14)Myers D 2001 Psychology 6th edn. Worth Publishers New York p.673
(15)ibid. p.674
(16)ibid. p.674

Why?

In one episode of the series 'Geldof in Africa'(1) Bob Geldof tells a horrific story of one warlord's kidnapping and subsequent abuse of children.
Listening to the story it is hard to believe how someone could treat another human being in that way.
And you ask yourself why?
Is it merely because they have power and no one stops them that they use their power to abuse?

Why?
This is the question I wanted answered after I was raped.
The following theories may be useful in trying to answer that question but they are not sufficient and may not be useful for everyone.

These 5 theories for possible motivations for rape have been identified by Polaschek and Ward (2002)(2). In a study by Beech, Ward and Fisher (2009) these theories were assessed through interviews with 41 jailed rapists.

-25 of the men interviewed fitted into the theory that other people had treated them abusively and because of this they carried "entrenched feelings of resentment and anger"(3). These men thought that other people wanted to hurt them and because they believed themselves capable of retaliating then they wanted instead to dominate and control others who they saw as threatening to them, often a partner or ex-partner(4).

-The theory that women are sexual objects was held by 21 of the men. Men holding this theory believed that women's desires centred around sex and therefore they should always be receptive and avaliable to men's desire for sex, even if it's coerced(5). This theory precludes women from being recognized as individual and autonomous persons.

-That men are entitled to take sex if they want it was a theory held by 18 of the men. They believed that because they are men and more powerful then their needs are more important than those of others and they are therefore entitled to do whatever they like(6) .

-6 of the men believed that they were unable to control their sex drive. So their loss of control was instead blamed on the woman or other features of the environment (7) .

-The final theory held by 3 of the men was that women are mean and spiteful and always trying to con men so all interactions with women must be hostile(8) .

These theories were held in combinations amongst the men. Some of the men were motivated more by sexual desires and others by anger and hostility, also there were those whose motives were sadistic and who needed to exert power through sexually humiliating and psychologically distressing the woman(9).

All of these theories contain the idea of power being exerted over another human being either because the offender believes they have the right to do that or because they feel that they can.

Ward suggests that these theories generate the thoughts and motivational beliefs that construct the world at a functioning level(10) for these men. He considers these theories to be 'cognitive distortions'. That is the information that has been acquired, organised and transformed by these men from their social environment has been developed into social behaviour and functioning that can be injurious to others(11).

Considering that most rapes are not reported and of those that are only one in 100 is likely to achieve a conviction(12) the very sad implication from this research seems to be that there are alot of men in our society whose view of the world and of their relationships with women is shaped by these theories. "These offenders are a good deal more like other people than most people would like to think"(13).

(1)Bob Geldof 2006 Geldof in Africa WEA Productions
(2)Polaschek and Ward (2002) cited in Beech A, Ward T & Fisher D 2009 The identification of sexual and violent motivations in men who assault women: implication for treatment Journal of Interpersonal Violence vol.21 no.12 pp.1636
(3)ibid. p.1641
(4)ibid. p.1637
(5)ibid. p.1641 & p.1637
(6)ibid. p.1642
(7)ibid. p.1637
(8)ibid. p.1638
(9)ibid. p.1648
(10)ibid. p.1637
(11)"social cognition n." A Dictionary of Psychology. Edited by Andrew M Colman Oxford University Press 2009. Oxford reference Online. Oxford University Press
(12)Donnelly M "Our society is so easy on rape that it's a crime" Sydney Morning Herald Tuesday June 19th 2001
(13) Beech A, Ward T & Fisher D - same article as above- p. 1636

Poetry

The Rape
Surreal, unreal, unfeel
My pants to my knees
Bare bum on stony ground
Round white legs mottled grey like his cock
Under the streetlights
Under the needle-leaf Casuarina
My pants to my knees

My blood on my clothes, my shoes, my skin
My blood staining dark his knife's edge
Sharpened edge held to my side
The whole time
The whole length of time
Surreal
Unfeel

Dealing with the Pain

It's a near pitch black, ice cold pre-dawn. Only the light of a single streetlight 30 metres away allows visibility.
You are on your stomach. Your face is pressed into the gnarled surface of a concrete footbridge. Your pants are to your knees.
A stranger lies on your back, heavy as lead. The blade of his knife you hold in your right hand. He holds the handle. His other hand is down between your legs.
He lets go of the knife. You grab it now with both hands.
Thwack!Whack! He beats your hands into the concrete. Thwack again! Your face hits the concrete as he starts to beat you in the head.
His weight lifts from your body. You spin around to face him. He takes the knife.
He guides you under some trees and rapes you there with the knife held to your side.

How would you deal with the pain from something like that? How would you deal with the violation , the humiliation, the anger?

Then months later in a shopping centre- "You know she's a slut". And later still "Slut" "There's slut" "Whore" etc., etc., etc.

So this is the " Blow upon a Bruise"(1) The pain that is inflicted before you are even healed from the first blow.
I cannot explain why people think that abusing a complete stranger is acceptable just because a rapist says so. I am not a slut and was never called one until after I was raped but this has been my experience since the rape and only 1 man so far has come to me and apologised for abusing me.

And how would you deal with this added pain? This inexplicable callous abuse not of your body this time but of your sense of self?

I remember I would come home from work and just sit in the bathtub with the shower water running on my head. The droplets falling on my head and shoulders, the sound of the water in my ears -blocking out everything else. I didn't have to think about anything. I just sat there for an hour and a half or two doing nothing believing that at least I had the sanctity of the privacy of my home.
I was not able to talk about the rape then and this is often the case with victims of sexual abuse. Due to self-doubts and guilt and fear they will not speak about the crimes committed against them(2).
But now I do talk about it and write poetry about the rape and the abuse which is one way I have found to deal with it.

In a Story of Survival by Cecily she also speaks of using water not only to cleanse her after being raped but rather to soothe her.
"I didn’t feel dirty or ashamed after I was raped. I was scared, freaked out, and then really, really angry. I remember at the time just wanting to scream and let out a kind of roar of rage. At the end of the night, after going back to where the rape had happened with the police, after medical examinations and after talking with the police for hours and hours, I finally came home and had a shower. But it wasn’t because I felt dirty or embarrassed or ashamed, it was because I was so tired and water can be so soothing. "(3)

In a story by Zoe http://www.survivingtothriving.org/shareyourstory
she talks of disassociation, derealization, suicidal depression, self-mutilation and panic attacks plus other clinical manifestations after the rape.
These are symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder which occurs to about one third of women post rape(3).
Research indicates that talking about rape soon after it has occurred reduces the risk of PTSD(4). Above all " present control over one's recovery process" was the most influential component in lessening the symptoms of PTSD(5).

Unfortunately alot of rape and sexual abuse victims also choose alcohol and drugs to numb the pain of the abuse.

(1)Peters J & Kaye L 2003 Chidhood sexual abuse: a review of its impact on older women entering institutional settings Clinical Gerontologist vol. 26 no.3/4 pp.41

(2)Michelle Cazzulino 'Victims find courage to speak of sex abuse' Daily Telegraph Thursday August 15th 2002

(3)Cecily 1998 A story of survival Dulwich Centre Journal 2&3 pp. 64-67 Dulwich Centre Publications
(4)Ullman S, Filipas H, Townsend S & Starzynski L 2007 Psychosocial correlates of PTSD symptom severity in sexual assault survivors Journal of Traumatic Stress vol.20 no.5 pp.821
(5)ibid. p.827
(6)ibid. p.829

Sexual Assault Investigation Kit Examination

In Australia when a sexual assault is reported to the police the victim has the option of undergoing a sexual assualt investigation kit examination. This examination is done to collect any specimens which could be used in a court of law (forensic evidence).

The Crimes (forensic procedures) Act 2000 gives details of the legislation and how the procedures should be carried out. http://www.legislation.act.gov.au/a/2000-61/current/pdf/2000-61.pdflation.act.gov.au/a/2000-61/current/pdf/2000-61.pdf

49 General rules for carrying out forensic procedures
A forensic procedure—
(a) must be carried out in circumstances providing reasonable
privacy to the relevant person; and
(b) except as permitted under another provision of this Act, must
not be carried out in the presence or view of anyone who is of
the opposite sex to the relevant person; and
(c) must not be carried out in the presence or view of a person
whose presence is not necessary for the forensic procedure or
required or permitted under another provision of this Act; and
(d) must not involve the removal of more clothing than is
necessary for carrying out the procedure; and
(e) must not involve more visual inspection than is necessary for
carrying out the procedure.

The Act refers mainly to offenders but part 2.8 section 79 and 80 refers to volunteers.Consent is required for the procedure to go ahead.

Below are pictures of the forms used during my examination.
The examination is alot like having a pap smear. As undignified and unpleasant. Yet if it manages to gain the evidence necessary it is worthwhile.

What's in a Name?

"There is more force in names then most men dream of" James Russell Lowell(1)

Your personal name or christian name is bound to your identity and sense of self. Your name also carries with it complicated social implications as well(2).
When you are recognized and acknowledged by your name your human dignity and uniqueness are recognized(3). This recognition is a central part of your sense of self and the meaningfulness of your life(4).
However when there is conflict between people whether through war or prejudice or bullying the use of derogatory names for the 'other' is included as part of the initial stages of the conflict(5). The derogatory names that are used also carry with them social implications that are recognised by others in the community and they can be used to deprive the person of their humanity and individuality.
These derogatory names designate so-called negative characteristics of the person in order to emphasise difference from the 'in-group'. Difference is at the centre of bullying(6) and name calling can extend to the persons nationality, appearance, family and friends(7).

In the year 2000 6 young women, possibly more, were raped in western Sydney. These women were called "Aussie pigs" and "sluts"(8) while they were being raped. Why? Because by calling them by these derogatory names they could be thought of as objects or things and not as human beings. This "is based on the idea that it is acceptable to project whatever hatred you might be feeling on to the bodies of women"(9).
Others who were there but not involved in the rapes were encouraged to abuse the women as well in order to make them accomplices(10).


(1)Mullen B, Calogero R & Leader T 2007 A Social psychological study of ethnonyms: cognitive representation of the in-group and intergroup hostility Journal of Personality and Social Psychology vol.92 no.4 pp.612
(2)Thompson R 2006 Bilingual, bicultural and binominal identities:personal name investment and the imagination in the lives of Korean Americans Journal of Language, Identity and Education vol.5 no.3 pp.180
(3)Crisp J & Taylor C 2005 Potter & Perry's Fundamentals of Nursing 2nd ed. Elsevier Marrickville pp428
(4)Wong J 2002 What's in a name? An examination of social identities Journal for the Theory of Social Behaviour vol.32 no,4 pp.453
(5)Hamarus P & Kaikkonen P 2008 School bullying as a creator of pupil peer pressure Educational Research vol. 50 no.4 pp.334
(6)ibid:pp.336
(7)ibid:pp.337

The article above on school bullying is a good article to read, for those interested, to understand the concepts and practices that create the cultures that enable bullying behaviour to develop and continue . It does not contain alot of information about dealing with the behaviours or the culture once it is formed but there is a list of references at the end of the article that you could find useful.
If you go into the following site and type the name of the article into the place to search you should be able to read the article. http://www.informaworld.com/smpp/home~db=all


(8)Bone, Pamela 2002 'Rape:the debate we have to have' The Age Melbourne, Australia. Wednesday July 24th 2002 http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2002/07/23/1027332376292.html
(9)ibid: This is a direct quote from the above article
(10)Donnelly, Marea 2001 'Our society is so easy on rape that it's a crime' The Sydney Morning Herald, Australia Tuesday June 19th 2001http://www.mail-archive.com/recoznettwo@green.net.au/msg00528.html

Statistics

There are no definitive statistics for sexual assault in Australia as most victims do not report the assault to the police nor do they access the services provided to assist them(1). The Australian Bureau of Statistic data for 2003 is

VICTIMS OF SEXUAL ASSAULT, By sex, Australia, 2003
VICTIMS
Female 14 892 women 148.8 per 100 000 population
Male 3 255 men 33.0 per 100 000 population
Persons 18 237 persons 91.7 per 100 000 population
(a)Includes victims for whom sex was not specified.
Source: ABS, Recorded Crime - Victims, Australia, 2003
(cat. no. 4510.0), Table 3.(2)

If you press the URL below and then click on the .pdf symbol you should be able to access the ABS statistical overview on sexual assualt for 2004.
http://www.abs.gov.au/AUSSTATS/abs@.nsf/DetailsPage/4523.02004?OpenDocument
More recent statistics for Australia are divided by state and available athttp://www.abs.gov.au/


In the ten years from 1993 to 2003 the 'victimisation prevalence rate' increased by about a third to 91.7 persons per 100 000.
In the same period there has been a 50% increase in the recorded number of victims from 12 186 to 18 237.
The ABS states that these changes could be due to an increased recognition of assault as a crime, the change in the desire to report sexual assault, changes in recording practices or any of these and not necessarily changes in numbers of incidents(3).

Epidemiological research data from overseas relating to child sexual abuse shows that anywhere from 25% - 30% or even as high as 42% of women under the age of 18 have been sexually abused, 9% repeatedly(4).


(1) Australian Bureau of Statistics 2004 Sexual Assault in Australia: a Statistical Overview 4523.0 ABS Canberra 7th September 2004 pp.14

(2)ibid.pp19

(3)ibid.pp23

(4)Peters,J & Kaye,L 2003 Childhood sexual abuse:a review of its impact on older women entering institutional settings Clinical Gerontologist vol.26 (3/4) pp.29